Anxiety: noun
| 1. | distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune: He felt anxiety about the possible loss of his job. |
| 2. | earnest but tense desire; eagerness: He had a keen anxiety to succeed in his work. |
| 3. | Psychiatry. a state of apprehension and psychic tension occurring in some forms of mental disorder. |
Hmmm-- all of these could apply to me at this moment lol. (The third one especially makes me laugh!) I have been kinda freaking out about having this kid. I think it all started when the dr.s started talking about how big the baby might be. Also I had this little tear in a weird place (I won't go into detail- you're welcome) after I had Kara that hurt sooooooooo stinkin bad for like 3 weeks after I had her. Plus Brock was my smallest baby by almost a pound and was by far my very easiest recovery. I think all of those things combined are giving me anxiety attacks about how the longer the kid is in me, the bigger it will be, and the harder on my body it will be to push it out! I'm just not excited about the aftermath of pushing a child out. I know I'm totally overreacting and it won't be nearly as bad as I'm picturing in my head but man- I just am having issues. I keep just hoping and praying it comes out NOW just so it'll be smaller on my poor girl parts! Eeekk... Oh the joys of motherhood!!! I love the pregnancy part! And I don't mind the newborn so much- it's just the effects on my body that trip me out... I think if it wasn't for that I could have lots more kids. Maybe I just need crazy pills!! Who knows?!
Just so you know- I'm not that freaked out and I'm fine. :)
4 comments:
You are right...the afterbirth recovery is the worst. I had a similar 3-4 week recovery pains with Luke and it was awful. I hope you go into labor very soon and have a 7 pounder! Good luck!
I have been checking in every day to see how you are, and if this little miracle has arrived. You're in my prayers. Your children are all so beautiful! Soon! BBB (Gwen)
you're really making me reconsider if i'm EVER gonna have kids. just kidding. :) but sorta.
You totally put into words the exact way that I feel too. Don't mind the pregnancy, or the newborn... it's the weird aftermath of craziness that happens to my body.
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